Fitness? No thanks

I got the following message from Fitness Magazine:
Dear MARY,

I just talked our publisher into giving you the MOST AMAZING bargain ever on FITNESSĀ® Magazine …

Get a full year (10 issues) for JUST $5.99

Because I’ve got a hunch you’re the kind of woman who’s ready … to shape up, slim down, get stronger, look better and feel sexier than you ever dreamed possible!

ACT NOW and I’ll include our Six Guides for an Amazing New You — full of ways to jolt your metabolism, eat your way thin, as well as an overall health and wellness plan!

Poor delusional Fitness Magazine people. Now where is my copy of “Atrophy”?